In our society we value responsibility and individualism. It’s good to be able to care for yourself and make your own decisions. It is also okay to ask for help! Asking for help doesn’t mean that you’ve completely failed at being independent. There’s nothing to be ashamed of, it’s just a part of life.
I was always scared to confide in my parents about my anxiety disorder. I suffered many years in silence hoping that they would catch on without me having to tell them I couldn’t go through it alone. Sure, they noticed some signs but I can’t blame them for not seeing how much I was struggling. I finally found the courage to tell them, I knew I would be safe and I would face no judgements. Since telling my parents I’ve been able to get access to care that I never even knew existed! I feel like I can live my life normally and I still have a lot of support.
This applies to smaller issues too. I remember being in school and not wanting to ask teachers for help. I felt stupid and didn’t want to single myself out. Of course my grades plummeted and I chose to do nothing about it. Looking back on it, I don’t think the teachers would have minded one bit if I went to them for help. That’s their job anyway, to help me learn!
It’s easier said than done, I get that. I have no problem telling my friends they can come to me for help but it just doesn’t feel easy to go to them. It makes sense, we are so much harder on ourselves. I think what we need to learn is that if we don’t ask for help we may end up in a very dangerous or unfavorable position.
So, if you need help with something… go tell someone!